Bonilla Post (my first article for Women to Watch)

(I have been asked to write regular posts about my humanitarian experiences, this is the first one. Check out this address to see the actual post-a a fun website)

http://www.crazibeautiful.com/GirlfriendToGirlfriend/ExpertHome.aspx?id=1


The Starfish StoryOriginal Story by: Loren Eisley

One day a man was walking along the beach when he noticed a boy picking something up and gently throwing it into the ocean.
Approaching the boy, he asked, “What are you doing?”
The youth replied, “Throwing starfish back into the ocean. The surf is up and the tide is going out. If I don’t throw them back, they’ll die.”
“Son,” the man said, “don’t you realize there are miles and miles of beach and hundreds of starfish? You can’t make a difference!”
After listening politely, the boy bent down, picked up another starfish, and threw it back into the surf. Then, smiling at the man, he said…”I made a difference for that one.”

That story so effectively illustrates the humanitarian world as I have come to know it.
In this section of Girlfriend to Girlfriend I would like to spotlight the individual “starfish” and the “throwers” that I have personally come to know. Just like you and me they are just a few among the teeming billions on the earth but they are living and doing good things and living good lives in the midst of the seeming futility.
This first spotlight is a starfish and a thrower, and she has made a profound impression on me.
I have been abundantly blessed in that we have had the opportunity to take our children on a few of our humanitarian trips, this one was part service and mostly fun to beautiful Panama.
It was just after Christmas, this past season(2008) and I wanted my little family to have a “Christmas Giving Experience” a little bigger than they had in the past. We asked our kids if they would give up a part of their Christmas for a family in need in Panama. My sister who lives in Panama knew just the family to help. They are the Bonilla family, Mother and Father and 7 children, they are members of my sister’s LDS ward in Panama. Their home is located up in the mountains, 20 minutes from a bus stop, up a steep and rough dirt road. The family must make the hike for work, school, and church. Their home is neat and orderly but is just multiple pieces of sheet metal screwed together to make one room 10’X15’, that serves as bedroom, living room, kitchen, but no bathroom. Brother Bonilla works hard at a very low paying job, picking up garbage from the side of the road.

As a combined effort of my sister’s family, mine, donations from neighbors, and some help from our charity, we made the trek to their house with a van full of toys, clothes, and items for the house.

After the initial shock of seeing their living conditions, I noticed something beautiful. Sister Bonilla is this very small, graceful, smiling woman. That was one of the things my sister mentioned about her before we even met, that while her circumstances are dire she is always smiling, positive and soft. My sister mentioned that in the year that she has lived there only twice has Sister Bonilla approached her and humbly asked for food as they had absolutely no food at the house, and yet even as she is asking you can see the faith in her eyes that she knows the Lord will provide. As we meet her children they are clean and look healthy and help us unload the van of presents we have brought. They are painfully shy but they don’t stop smiling the entire time we are with them. The family opens the presents, embarrassed and grateful (we didn’t realize until the middle of the present opening that it is not the custom in Panama to open presents in front of the giver.). As you look around the yard you can see the creativity and ingenuity of the children, out of scraps and garbage they have made a bridge and roadway, a wrestling ring, and a dollhouse for their few toys.
We spent the whole afternoon with them, after the presents we took them in to get some dinner and to buy some shoes. Sister Bonilla was smiling and so affectionate with the children, and the older children helped the younger ones stay together. You can tell that they are well loved.

This was an amazing experience for me personally. I went with the expectation that the presents and material things would provide the excitement of the day, when in reality they were the most ordinary part. The excitement was seeing my little girl and hers starting a relationship despite language, economic, and cultural barriers. My daughter would hold up something and say its name in English like “battery” and Lorenza would say the word in Spanish “batteria” and then they would giggle.
As I watched Sister Bonilla smile and interact with her children I learned a priceless lesson, that you can be happy without indoor plumbing, that you can be an exceptional mother with nothing but yourself to give, that you can show faith and perseverance when you don’t even know if you will have food to feed your children the next day, that in all truth and honesty, happiness can be found in the love of family and faith in God alone.
Most of all I learned that she is truly my sister and that our Father used a little bit of me for her and a little bit of her for me, to remind us both that he is aware of and loves us.